Obsticales

Obsticals we will over come.  Life throws them in our path all the time.  There never is a good or right time for them but they dont bother to ask anyhow, they just SHOW UP.

We have been thrown some this past week & some that we have to deal with in weeks ahead.  We are overwhelemed, unsure, & honestly just plain freaking out.  I know our chocies... we really dont have any.  But we will get threw this as a family.

I dont think people realize how many couples with "sick" kids stay together as a couple.  They blame each other; really dont see the point in that.  If they are like me, I blame myself enough.  They argue, they fight.  They cant handles the pressure of having to deal the hand that life gave them.  We do our good share of arguing and we do our share of melt downs.  We are not always on the same page, we just try.  That is all that we can do, and I think we do a pretty damn good job if you ask me.

Obsticales are put in your path to try you.  Either you can let it or you can beat it.  Its funny how much a 8 year old can teach you about life, courage, & the strength to never give up.  I could only wish to bethat strong.  I hope I never disapoint him.

If you look up courage & strength in the Dictonary they should insert a pic of this amazing strong kid in there.  I know I have said it before, but he is truely my hero.

Decsions

Desisions


I love being a Mom.  Yeah at one point in my life I wanted to go t college & a be a physical therapist and being a Mom was no where on my "want to do list".  Life changes in a second your future is never written in stone.  The day found out I was going to be a Mommy I realized this.  Some people balance motherhood & carrers but that is not what was cut out for me.  Believe me I tried it.  Not everyone can have the blessing to be a stay at home mom but I am lucky that I have that stability in my life that my Husband creates for his family.


Staying home allows be to pick the kids up from school when they are sick, snuggle at home and not have a care in the world when I am wrapped up in a Disney with them.  These are the days I will never get back and the ones I hope they look back on I see that I had time for them.


Being a Mom is not always a Disney Movie though.  You are the Mom, the fixer of all things broken, the finder of all things lost, and to go to for all crisis matter.  For recent example turnining your sons security blanket pink is a major crisis!!  You also have to  make descisions EVERYDAY. Whats for dinner, what out fit will look best for the school pics, Did Adam wear the right shoes he needed for gym class, Did Robbie remember to take his typed English paper, Did I remeber to gel Justin's fuaxhawk before he left, did I get all Rob;s paper work sent in.  Some are big, some are small.  At the end of the day your family relies on you to make big & little decision that will effect thier day, thier week, maybe even their life.


Sometimes I make wrong decisions.  I think we are all guilty of that.  Little ones that don't matter right up to the BIG ... OMG's!  I try, & that is all I hope anyone expects from me.


My friends know the struggles that I am going through and the decisions that me and Rob are going to have to be making as parents.  We just want to do what is best for all involved and especially for whom is affected.  I doubt myself sometimes but I think that is normal.  We will get it ... I am keeping faith in that.

Life is Full of Choices... you just have to make the the decisons that are right for you and yours and not compare yourelf to others.

Father's Day

Great, tomorrows Father's Day!  Don't get me wrong...its awesome to celebrate the fathers that have made us the people we are today.  Unfortunatley we are going to be missing 2 very important ones.  This will be my 2nd Fathers Day without my Dad & our 1st without Rob's.  We will try to focus on the times we had & the memories they gave us but it will be hard...Very Hard.

My Dad was Awesome.  I think we were so much a like we couldnt stand it at times.  I loved him more than life & I tried right till the very end to keep him here as long as I could.  I have so many memories.  He was a good dad.  I was never short on love, hugs, & kisses.  He loved my kids & he loved my husband...maybe more than me...LOL.  He thought the world of his grandkids and I think they completed his life. He impacted each of their lives and gave them each memories they will have forever.

My Papa... my Mom's Dad died when I was very young. I think around 9 or 10.  Amazingly I have very clear memories of him.  He was always smiling & loved when we came to visit.  He would always give me, my brother, & my sister 2 Nutter Butters a piece and Mountain Dew to split.  He always hugged us & told us he loved us. The little things in life.

My Grandfather, my Dad's dad died when I was a young teenager, 13 I believe.  Although I was older I dont have very many memories of him and the ones I do are not all that great.  He was a very strick, hard working man.  He was military & after he got out of the military he became a union worker.  I respect his hard work, but I cant ever recall him telling me that he loved me.

Rob's Grandfather had been a part of my life as long as he has.  The last 17 years I have spent building a realtionship with him.  He is a strong, wise man.  He is also a man full of love & kindness.  He has worked hard in his life to be the man he is today and had earned the respect of many people along the way... including mine.  I have learned a lot from him about love, honor, & respect.  He loves his kids, his grandkids, & his great grandkids & there is nothing he wouldnt do for them.

Rob's Dad was a puzzle.  I think I had just figured him out and without warning he was taken from us.  He had a rough life and the path he chose to take in life was not always the right one but in the end he loved his kids & he loved his grandkids, he just took the long road.  My kids all learned things from him him and they all have good memories and that is important to me.

Rob is a great Dad.  He has proven a many people wrong on that note.  To all the people who said that he would never amount to anything and never be a Dad... in your face.  He does it all.  He takes them camping, fishing, bike riding, you name it, he does it.  Rob had grown up (for the most part) and he has grown in to one awesome dad.  His kids respect him (that's important) and they love him.  he had instilled the importance of education and the importance of hard work.  He has also spoiled them all into rotten brats to, but that is besides the point.  I think we did that together.

I have know clue what I am doing

I guess I am a offically a blogger...whater that is suppose to mean.  I am looking for outlets to focus my negative thoughts & energy & I thought I maybe I shared & wrote about them it woule help.  So I thought I would give it a shot.

For those of you that don't know I am  a mom to 3 wonderful boys. Robbie who is now 15, Justin who is now 11, & Adam who is 8.  I have been with the love of my life for 17yrs.  He is my rock.  Yes we have out moments but as long as the good out weights the bad & our kids are gettting what they need & being loved by both their parents I think we are doing an awesome job.  We may not be text book parents & we dont follow any hand book but I believe we are rasing good boys with beliefs & values of making a future for themseleves.

We have has quite a stressfull month with out littl one Adam.  For those of you dont know he has a very extensive medical history.  His Cystic Fibrosis & Crons have had him down & out for weeks now.  The meds that are suppose to be making him feel better have swelt him up beyonf recgonation and dont seem to be really doing anythign else.  They pain of the chrons has been intense for him and we have had to put him on morphine to keep him comfortable.

We have delt with a lot at CHKD.  We are blessed to have a childrens hospital so close.  I have no issues from a pulomnary stand point.  His CF team stays on top of things & I feel very lucky to have them.  The GI Team there is a total diffrent story.  Pretty sure I think I could be more qualified than what we are dealing with.  For a DR to scratch thier head I say "im not rally sure what is going on, he has me confused" is nt the best thing to say to a mother who has been going through literal hell with their child that past few weeks.  And one thing i DO NOT handle well is seeing my child in pain.

So to make a long story short we will be going up tp John Hopkins in Baltimore next week.  Hopefull we can get some answers from him & not a head scratch.  I just hope & pray we are able to get himso relief so he can enjoy his summer.  I will try & keep this updated with his progress.  I know he has many family & frriends who care so much about him it would be impossible to call you all.  Thank you all for your continued support, thoughts, & prayers as our family continues on this jouney.

<3
Christy